Sunday, April 27, 2014

The Eight-Legged Pudu Deer

I looked down at my drawing with dismay.
I had the art book next to where
I was teaching the kids
how to draw a deer step-by-step.
My images were being captured by a
document camera and being displayed
on a large white screen behind me.
I had been in a hurry and grabbed a
black Flair pen instead of a pencil
and now I was going to pay for it.
I'd shown the kids how to draw the pudu
laying down with its legs tucked around
it and went on for the four brave kids
that wanted deer-legs standing up.
That was when I realized I couldn't
erase the first four legs.
"Oops. I accidentally drew
an eight-legged pudu deer."
It looked like the thirty second graders
were going to fall off their chairs
they were laughing so hard.
I might have needed more than one
"How to teach art to kids"

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Jesus Christ Made Seattle Under Protest: Special Delivery Driver

I carefully wedged my large white postal
two-ton truck into the load zone.
I was thrilled to be in the dark canyon
of tall buildings with such an
important mission:
Special Delivery Mail!
It was special too and my old trainer John
had a big hustle as he dropped out of the truck
and zipped around behind our truck to
unload trays of special deliver mail
needing to go inside to all the law firms.
I took a deep breath as we entered the
building and he rolled the handtruck
to the bank of elevators.
My long blond hair was tied back in a ponytail
and I had on my blue two piece femailman
uniform with my shiny oval Special Delivery pin
pinned proudly to my then-small chest.
"Okay, here's the important thing kid."
John said looking down at me, "Always smile."
"You would not believe the loot
these guys give out at Christmas
if you give them great service and a big smile."
"Special Delivery is expensive and you gotta hustle!"
I smiled and quickened my step and dashed
around the sky-scraper one floor at a time.
"Good job kid. Now hop in and look at the
next mail and figure out where to park next."
I reached down and picked up the bundle and read the address.
"Hmmm" I thought as I read it and concentrated on what John taught me.
Jesus Christ Made Seattle Under Protest. Seattle streets running south to north.
Jefferson James
Cherry, Columbia
Marion, Madison
Spring, Seneca
University, Union
Pike and Pine
I looked over at John who was sucking deeply on his cigarette,
"Got it boss!" I exclaimed.
He looked at me and grinned, "Good job kid."