Sunday, September 25, 2011

9/25/2011 Teenage Boys Sawing Trees Dangerously

My goodness,
what the kids won't do to kill me!
We live on the edge of a forty acre swamp
and the squirrels continually plant trees
of every kind everywhere.
The hazelnut trees started scraping the paint
off the sides of my mini van this summer
along the side of our driveway.
So I bribed the kids to let their friends
sleep over in the land of Kool Aid,
popcorn, pizza and zombie destruction
in exchange for sawing down trees.
I have small, sharp handsaws that I let them use.
We've only had to go to the ER once
and that led to the implementation of
the leather glove to saw rule.
We've had no accidents since the rule began.
But last night, I made the mistake of
spying on Troy and Sean.
What did I see?
Two teenage boys sawing the same small tree
at the same location opposite each other
with very sharp saws.
What did I do?
Nothing much.
Took out my foam earplugs, and removed
my orange Home Depot noise-blocking headset
and waited for the yell down the stairs
that there was blood.
No blood, no foul.

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